Survival story: Woman tells story of being advocate for her children

There was once a time when those looking at Dely Jamerson might think she had it all together. Looks, though, were deceiving.

Truthfully, she was handling the horror that a predator was abusing her children. 

Jamerson, who lives in Laurens County, was the keynote speaker during the annual Stepping Stone Child Abuse Prevention Luncheon held at the Colemoor Estate on April 21. 

In 2013, Jamerson and her husband at the time moved from California to Georgia with their four children. She left her family, friends and everything she knew because she believed they would build a better future for them.

“For a while, we felt like we were doing just that,” Jamerson said. “In 2017, we bought our first home and land in a small community. It felt safe. I felt like we had built something beautiful. But the life I thought I had built came crashing down when I discovered something unimaginable.”

With a pause, Jamerson continued.

“I am the mother of two sexual abuse survivors,” Jamerson said. “Their predator was my husband for nearly two decades. When people hear stories like this, their focus rightfully goes to the victims. But what people rarely talk about is the impact this kind of trauma has on the caregiver. I was trying to hold everything together when the entire world feels like it is collapsing. It often felt like I had been thrown into the middle of the ocean without knowing how to swim and without a life jacket. We were just trying to survive.” 

Jamerson said there were days when the pain was so much that she thought about ending her life. 

“But when you are a mother, giving up is not an option,” she said. “My children deserved justice. They deserved healing. They deserved peace. So, I kept fighting. I became their advocate.” 

She stayed connected with her faith and God. Jamerson tried to show them what resilience and strength looks like and what it meant to keep going no matter what happened.

“This journey has not been easy,” Jamerson said. “I knew I was standing in the aisle of a life-altering, traumatic event. I struggled deeply. What I came to understand through this process is things can be messy and complicated. Sometimes it feels like you are walking through a storm without an umbrella.” 

Some resources in the community were good while others were not. 

“There were people who fought for my family when I felt like there was nothing left to give,” Jamerson said. “There were individuals who reminded me that I was not alone.”

There was time it felt like it took forever for help to come. When it did, Jamerson reached out for it. There were agencies that worked tirelessly to get her children back into her care.

“And yet, other agencies placed my son into the custody and grasp of the very predator I was trying to protect him from,” Jamerson said. “There were moments where my children’s predator would show up at my house and even relocated two minutes from my home. It’s difficult to protect yourself from a predator when you are unable to obtain a restraining order because the abuse you endured was not considered physical.” 

Jamerson said the abuse was psychological and emotional. She said it was devastating. She felt alone. Over time, she has learned how to deal with them, though they have not completely disappear.

“I have made it my mission to stay in the light,” Jamerson said. “When you stay in the light, it grows. I stopped focusing on the storm and started learning how to dance in the rain. I learn how to advocate for my children and myself.”

She hopes her story can impact other victims and encourage them to find their voice and speak their truth. Despite the obstacles, they are still survivors.

“There are resources in the form of people, advocacy groups and communities that want to help you rebuild and grow them to be the very best version of yourself,” Jamerson said. “It is my hope that my story will help people reclaim their power and their voice.”

She hopes to one day complete a book on her experience.

“No one deserves to be preyed upon,” Jamerson said. “No child should ever have to suffer in silence. My experience has taught me the power of never giving up.” 

Organizations like Stepping Stone played a big part to Jamerson and her family. She reached out to the agency for help more than once.

“Not one single time was I turned away,” Jamerson said. “I was not judged. They connected my family with therapy, resources and guidances that became critical to our whole journey. Stepping Stone became the light for one of the darkest chapters of our lives. They also helped me realize something important. I am not just a caregiver, I am a survivor too. I made a decision that I was going to spend the rest of my  advocating for sexual assault survivors and their families.” 

She knows how lonely it can be going through this alone. She used to believe her story was about bumps.

“Today, my story is about survival,” Jamerson said. “It’s about a mother who refused to give up. It’s about the power of people and organizations who stands beside families when they need it most. My children are survivors and today I stand here as a survivor too. Not just for my family, but for every survivor and caregiver who are still fighting their way back to the light. Healing is possible. Justice is worth fighting for and none of us should have to walk this journey alone.”